January 8

Prompt: Something you Feel Guilty about

She's gone. 
And I never got to tell her goodbye.
She was one of my closest allies,
And now she's gone away.

I remember her beautiful smile,
How she could always give it away to someone else.
She was one of the kindest souls
that has ever blessed this earth. 

I know that she knew
How close I felt we were.
I'm sure she felt the same,
But I never truly knew for sure.

I remember getting told, 
On that fateful crisp srping day,
That something had happened,
And she could possibly go away.

I was young, and I was a child,
I didn't understand,
How taking her
Could ever be apart of His plan.

A few years went by,
She was still here.
The treatments made her forget them and me,
Which was the thing that I had most feared. 

***

It was a rainy April day, and I was sitting in my fifth grade classroom. I remember a teacher walking in and telling us that she had finally passed away. One of my closest friends was gone. We shared the same name, which is what began our bond. I lost her to childhood cancer, a week after she turned 13. I thought that I would see her again, and I didn't really get to say goodbye. 

The next few days were a mess of tears and confusion. Her younger brother had been in my class at school. I don't much remember her funeral, I just remember it being one of the saddest things I have ever attended. 

She is burried near my grandfather and I go see her when I can. It has really been gnawing at me for a while, the fact that I never told her goodbye. I know I'll see her again someday though, so that stands as my little ray of hope. 

Thank you for visiting my blog and God bless!!